Mindset of Breaking Free | Lynz Piper-Loomis

I have been processing for a bit on the best way to speak out regarding victims, survivors, and overcomers of sexual abuse, human trafficking, sexual assault and battery, etc...

On one hand, there are many of us not ready to speak out. It is extremely traumatic. On the other hand, there is no one better to speak up on these issues then those who have endured these atrocities. There is many vying for fame, name, and platform to get their 2 cents in. Sometimes, it is not even worth the 2 cents. 

What was our frame of mind when the event (s) occurred? What is our frame of mind now after time has passed? People ask why we did not just say "no" when we were being raped?! People ask why we wait years to speak up about it. The list goes on. 

I can tell you as a former child victim, that my first instinct was to say no and push back. It landed me with torture and being tied up and still raped. Not once. Not twice. Multiple times over the span of years. Why did it take so long to talk about it? Shame. Guilt. Just to name a couple of reasons. What if someone didn't say no? Does that mean it was consensual? Heck no. How about survival mode?! 

It is honestly criminal to shut down victims, survivors, or overcomers and automatically assume that we should have said no or should have stopped what happened to us. How do you stop a 250-pound man from raping you when you are less than 75 pounds? Where do you hide when you are handcuffed or tied to a bed? Where do you flee when you are locked in a dog cage?

Why is it the gut instinct for many in public to assume that the victim is lying just because of the "public image" of the sexual predator? Do people really believe that a 4-year-old would sit back in a room and concoct a plan of how to frame an old pervert for sexual assault and battery? Do people really think that a 12-year-old can consent to rape and torture? I mean where is the logic?

I think the above is sociopath disgusting. I think even more disgusting are the people that prey on the vulnerabilities of survivors to one up themselves. Maybe make an extra buck off a story just so they can get more online influence. Is this not still a form of trafficking?!

I hated my body for years and battled bulimia. It was like I had an invisible sign that said, "walk all over me" or "bully me". Until I understood I held the power in taking my voice back and changing my frame of mind. I had choices.

Now, I am curvy and working to be stronger at the gym. I no longer battle self-hatred or eating disorders. I learned my identity was/is found in Jesus Christ.  That is enough for me. If people are offended by my existence...it's not my problem. It's theirs.

My hope is to change the narrative in this space. There are a lot of talking heads that should not have any leadership at all in the anti-human trafficking arena. They consistently make themselves look like egotistical buffoons. There are great people also in the movement that are mostly unsung heroes, but also serve well because they focus on the mission and not themselves. 

My heart is to see more survivor/overcomer led solutions. We have lived it, and therefore, we have the greatest authority to serve in this arena.

Just my thoughts today.

In Liberty,

Lynz

P.S. If you take the side or you are defending a sex predator...you are just as complicit. 
 
todd kent by todd kent is licensed under Unsplash unsplash.com

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Lynz Piper-Loomis LLC
P.O. Box 40551
North Charleston, SC 29423
 

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